Want to take a guess on Daniel's birth date/time, measurements, hair and eye color? Click here to go to our free baby pool. No money on it, no prize for the winner, this is just for fun. We're looking forward to seeing the guesses we get.
A few pieces of information that might inform your guesses (or not):
- My official due date is July 17.
- At my prenatal checkups the midwife measures how high the fundus (top of the uterus) is and I've been consistently pretty much right on target, not measuring bigger or smaller than expected.
- As of my last appointment, June 24, no dilation yet.
- I was born 6 days late (sorry Mom!), weighed 7 lb 12 oz. and was 21 inches long.- Boys on average tend to be bigger at birth than girls, and 3 sonograms said we're definitely having a boy.
- Kevin was born 4 days late, weighed 7lb 4oz and was 20 inches long.
- We do not plan to induce labor if we go past the due date unless there is a medical reason to do so.
- I have blonde hair and blue eyes.
- Kevin has dark blond/light brown hair and green eyes.
So far, with 12 votes in, the consensus seems to be that he will make Hotel Utero and extended stay hotel, staying an extra 2-6 days. Average length prediction is about 20.5 inches, average weight is a healthy 8.21 lbs, though that average is skewed by one guess of 11.5 lbs! Either Cynthia comes from a family of VERY big babies, made a typo, or has it in for me! ;) Needless to say I'm hoping that estimate is very high. I can't even roll a bowling ball that weighs that much!
Majority opinion is Daniel will take after Mommy with blond hair and blue eyes, with a few votes for bald head (if the old wives' tales about how lots of acid reflux=full head of hair hold true, this kid will look like Cousin It though!) and a few for brown hair. Hazel eyes also picked up a few votes. I'd bet that his eyes may turn green/hazel by his first birthday but I'm pretty sure they'll be blue at birth. We'll see though...hopefully soon!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
Tomorrow, we are officially full term!
Welcome to the land of the full-term
In just a few hours we will hit a significant landmark. I will be 37 weeks along, which means from this point forward even if Daniel comes early he will be considered full-term. He'll probably grow a little more in the next few weeks but he should be all ready for life on the outside now. All those organs and bodily systems should be online and ready to report for duty.
I certainly wouldn't say the pregnancy has flown by, but July seemed so far off back in November and now it's just around the corner. I've bought milk with an expiration date after Daniel's due date (organic milk in a carton, it lasts for weeks!) and as I look around the house doing everyday things I wonder "will we finish this [can of coffee grounds, box of oatmeal, tube of toothpaste, etc] before Daniel is born?" For the record, my guess is that by D-day, we'll barely start on the next can of coffee, go through at least one more box of oatmeal, and still be on the same tube of toothpaste. It's funny to look at things like that and think how radically life will change by the time we next buy toothpaste!
"Lighten" the load
I've heard that it's common for babies around this stage to drop or "lighten" further down into the pelvis in anticipation of impending labor. Apparently Daniel has not gotten the memo about that next step on the to-do list.
I'm reminded of something I read about the Aggie Band when I started at A&M. They have march routines so complicated that a computer says they can't be done because there would have to be 2 people in the same space at the same time (I'm assuming in the past 13 years the computing world has caught up in that department).
What does that have to do with anything? Well first it's a shameless plug for my good old alma mater and the impressive halftime show that is the Fightin' Texas Aggie Band. But I digress.
I bring up the band maneuver analogy because it seems to describe the situation in my lower torso these days. Basic anatomy says that baby, lungs, stomach, and other internal organs all have to coexist in that area but it seems to involve trying to force 2 or more things to occupy the same space at the same time in violation of the laws of physics.
I have no firsthand basis for comparison but my theory is that late-stage pregnancy is particularly uncomfortable for a short-waisted woman like myself because there is so little space for everything to squeeze into. I've often wished I could have a few more inches of height in my torso but in the past it was about wanting to have flatter abs and look better in a bikini, now that wish is purely for comfort. Or more specifically, for less pain. Between baby, lungs, and everything else it's a fight for space in there, one that my body is losing to baby.
The Gaza strip of this battleground, where fighting is most intense, is the lower front of my right ribcage. For a few months now Daniel has been fond of nestling up under my ribs. I can feel the pressure not only on the ribs in front but also on my back. It has always been uncomfortable but in the last week it has graduated from dull ache to acute pain. My ribs feel simultaneously numb and tingly and tender and bruised all at the same time. And that's when he's not moving and just curled up there sleeping. When he is moving it's like he's trying to snap my rib in two or use it for a punching bag.
So, I'm hoping that he might be inclined to follow the script and drop down a bit soon to give my ribs a break. And maybe if that happens, I won't get winded going up the stairs or get acid reflux on a daily basis. I'm sure it'll be more painful in other respects and probably make me have to use the bathroom even more but that's a tradeoff I'm willing to make. Alas, I've resigned myself that I may just have to ride it out like this for the duration if he doesn't have any room to drop. At least it's nothing that won't get better within a few weeks.
Who needs sleep?
On a related note, I think I'm getting some good practice for those first weeks of motherhood. I hear that babies like to eat every few hours in those early weeks so you can't sleep more than about 2 hours at a time without having to get up.
It seems that Mother Nature in her wisdom has determined that the last month of pregnancy should be spent practicing the frequent wake-up drill. I go to bed about 10:30 or so and it seems like I get up every night around 12, 1:30, 2:30, and 4 before getting up for good around 5:30. I guess I'm at least a few weeks away from an uninterrupted night's sleep, if not months.
I'm usually waking up because I have to go to the bathroom but sometimes it's because of neck, shoulder or leg pain. I got the Boppy maternity pillow (below, from their website) this week which seems to help, but a truly comfortable night's sleep just doesn't seem to be in the cards for me these days.
So all in all, I am learning firsthand why you never seem to hear women talk about how much they enjoyed the last month of pregnancy. I do consider myself lucky though that I made it most of the way through the pregnancy without being too uncomfortable, and even now, I've still got it better than many women. I haven't had to go on bedrest and there are quite a few unpleasant pregnancy symptoms that I have been fortunate to skip altogether.
And even at this point, I can still not only see my toes but reach them well enough to trim the toenails. I can still get up from a sitting or kneeling position using just my legs without having to prop myself up first on my arms. And I can still perform the "power squat" maneuver of hovering over the potty to go, which as every lady knows beats sitting on a dirty public restroom seat. I can still fit comfortably behind the steering wheel of the car and I don't have any trouble getting into or out of the car. So while these weeks probably won't be remembered as being among my favorites in the pregnancy, it could surely be worse. And of course at the end of this race, just around the corner, is a wonderful prize that will be worth all the discomfort and sleeplessness along the way.
So now that you're officially full-term little fella, feel free to come on out anytime you're ready. I promise to let you kick me in the ribs all you want once you're out if you'll leave them alone for the duration of your time inside.
In just a few hours we will hit a significant landmark. I will be 37 weeks along, which means from this point forward even if Daniel comes early he will be considered full-term. He'll probably grow a little more in the next few weeks but he should be all ready for life on the outside now. All those organs and bodily systems should be online and ready to report for duty.
I certainly wouldn't say the pregnancy has flown by, but July seemed so far off back in November and now it's just around the corner. I've bought milk with an expiration date after Daniel's due date (organic milk in a carton, it lasts for weeks!) and as I look around the house doing everyday things I wonder "will we finish this [can of coffee grounds, box of oatmeal, tube of toothpaste, etc] before Daniel is born?" For the record, my guess is that by D-day, we'll barely start on the next can of coffee, go through at least one more box of oatmeal, and still be on the same tube of toothpaste. It's funny to look at things like that and think how radically life will change by the time we next buy toothpaste!
"Lighten" the load
I've heard that it's common for babies around this stage to drop or "lighten" further down into the pelvis in anticipation of impending labor. Apparently Daniel has not gotten the memo about that next step on the to-do list.
I'm reminded of something I read about the Aggie Band when I started at A&M. They have march routines so complicated that a computer says they can't be done because there would have to be 2 people in the same space at the same time (I'm assuming in the past 13 years the computing world has caught up in that department).
Photo courtesy of aggieband.com
What does that have to do with anything? Well first it's a shameless plug for my good old alma mater and the impressive halftime show that is the Fightin' Texas Aggie Band. But I digress.
I bring up the band maneuver analogy because it seems to describe the situation in my lower torso these days. Basic anatomy says that baby, lungs, stomach, and other internal organs all have to coexist in that area but it seems to involve trying to force 2 or more things to occupy the same space at the same time in violation of the laws of physics.
I have no firsthand basis for comparison but my theory is that late-stage pregnancy is particularly uncomfortable for a short-waisted woman like myself because there is so little space for everything to squeeze into. I've often wished I could have a few more inches of height in my torso but in the past it was about wanting to have flatter abs and look better in a bikini, now that wish is purely for comfort. Or more specifically, for less pain. Between baby, lungs, and everything else it's a fight for space in there, one that my body is losing to baby.
The Gaza strip of this battleground, where fighting is most intense, is the lower front of my right ribcage. For a few months now Daniel has been fond of nestling up under my ribs. I can feel the pressure not only on the ribs in front but also on my back. It has always been uncomfortable but in the last week it has graduated from dull ache to acute pain. My ribs feel simultaneously numb and tingly and tender and bruised all at the same time. And that's when he's not moving and just curled up there sleeping. When he is moving it's like he's trying to snap my rib in two or use it for a punching bag.
So, I'm hoping that he might be inclined to follow the script and drop down a bit soon to give my ribs a break. And maybe if that happens, I won't get winded going up the stairs or get acid reflux on a daily basis. I'm sure it'll be more painful in other respects and probably make me have to use the bathroom even more but that's a tradeoff I'm willing to make. Alas, I've resigned myself that I may just have to ride it out like this for the duration if he doesn't have any room to drop. At least it's nothing that won't get better within a few weeks.
Who needs sleep?
On a related note, I think I'm getting some good practice for those first weeks of motherhood. I hear that babies like to eat every few hours in those early weeks so you can't sleep more than about 2 hours at a time without having to get up.
It seems that Mother Nature in her wisdom has determined that the last month of pregnancy should be spent practicing the frequent wake-up drill. I go to bed about 10:30 or so and it seems like I get up every night around 12, 1:30, 2:30, and 4 before getting up for good around 5:30. I guess I'm at least a few weeks away from an uninterrupted night's sleep, if not months.
I'm usually waking up because I have to go to the bathroom but sometimes it's because of neck, shoulder or leg pain. I got the Boppy maternity pillow (below, from their website) this week which seems to help, but a truly comfortable night's sleep just doesn't seem to be in the cards for me these days.
And even at this point, I can still not only see my toes but reach them well enough to trim the toenails. I can still get up from a sitting or kneeling position using just my legs without having to prop myself up first on my arms. And I can still perform the "power squat" maneuver of hovering over the potty to go, which as every lady knows beats sitting on a dirty public restroom seat. I can still fit comfortably behind the steering wheel of the car and I don't have any trouble getting into or out of the car. So while these weeks probably won't be remembered as being among my favorites in the pregnancy, it could surely be worse. And of course at the end of this race, just around the corner, is a wonderful prize that will be worth all the discomfort and sleeplessness along the way.
So now that you're officially full-term little fella, feel free to come on out anytime you're ready. I promise to let you kick me in the ribs all you want once you're out if you'll leave them alone for the duration of your time inside.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
What a difference a few months makes!
Last night Kevin and I went to dinner at the Capital Grille to celebrate his birthday, his first Father's Day, and one last fancy dinner out before the baby comes. I wore my polka-dotted maternity dress and when we got home I looked at a picture from when I first wore it, for Brian and Marinda's wedding reception in early March. Look at the difference from then to now!
I have to say, I've been pretty impressed with my maternity wardrobe. The clothes had a good, flattering fit when I first bought them in the 5th month and now in the 9th, they are still fitting well. I had been told I'd probably have to go through a few sizes, but I bought my prepregnancy size and everything still fits fine. And the elastic waist is quite comfy. I see why people are reluctant to give them up, but I am looking forward to gettng back into my normal clothes again.
"You look so cute!"
Last night at dinner on the way back to our table from one of my (several) trips to the bathroom a lady at another table stopped me to tell me that I looked cute. It's always nice to hear that kind of thing when you're sporting an extra 30 pounds of belly.
On a related note, wherever I go, people tend to be pretty thoughtful, opening doors for me and offering to carry bags for me. And a few weeks ago at Lowe's a salesman chased me down while we were walking along to offer me a motorized scooter! My first thought was "do I look like I need a scooter?" but then thought, "yes, perhaps I do." I passed on the offer though. While I appreciate all the concern, it's a very weird feeling to be lumped in with the little old ladies in the "needs assistance" category. But as a friend with a baby pointed out, I might as well enjoy being the cute pregnant lady who needs a hand now. In a few months, everyone might be glaring at me when I've got the crying baby in the restaurant or store!
I was showing at that point, but not too much. I had only just switched over to maternity clothes a week or two earlier. Now I'm 13-14 weeks and probably another 20 pounds further along.
I have to say, I've been pretty impressed with my maternity wardrobe. The clothes had a good, flattering fit when I first bought them in the 5th month and now in the 9th, they are still fitting well. I had been told I'd probably have to go through a few sizes, but I bought my prepregnancy size and everything still fits fine. And the elastic waist is quite comfy. I see why people are reluctant to give them up, but I am looking forward to gettng back into my normal clothes again.
"You look so cute!"
Last night at dinner on the way back to our table from one of my (several) trips to the bathroom a lady at another table stopped me to tell me that I looked cute. It's always nice to hear that kind of thing when you're sporting an extra 30 pounds of belly.
On a related note, wherever I go, people tend to be pretty thoughtful, opening doors for me and offering to carry bags for me. And a few weeks ago at Lowe's a salesman chased me down while we were walking along to offer me a motorized scooter! My first thought was "do I look like I need a scooter?" but then thought, "yes, perhaps I do." I passed on the offer though. While I appreciate all the concern, it's a very weird feeling to be lumped in with the little old ladies in the "needs assistance" category. But as a friend with a baby pointed out, I might as well enjoy being the cute pregnant lady who needs a hand now. In a few months, everyone might be glaring at me when I've got the crying baby in the restaurant or store!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Just a few quick pictures
It's been awhile since I've posted some pictures, so here's my party of 1 1/2 is looking these days.
From the front and back, you can't really see the belly:
From the side however, you can't help but notice it. I am rather happy to report though that nearly 36 weeks and 30 pounds in, I still have no stretch marks
I'd also like to point out that I have apparently thus far overcome the family curse of varicose veins, and my ankles and feet haven't swollen too much:
By the way, these pictures were taken in Daniel's room which was just painted this week. The color looks great on the walls and now that that's done, we can put together the crib and dresser and decorate the room. Yay!
Two last pictures before I call it a night. First, all of his clothes (except the ones I got today at a work shower), washed and hanging up by size in his closet. As cute as they look hanging up, I'm sure they'll look ever cuter on him! The outfit on the far right is a pair of lederhosen and coordinating shirt we got in Munich when we went to Europe in September 2008. We bought it hoping a little Williamson would come along to wear it...I can't wait to get pictures of him in it, though I can already imagine the embarrassment they might cause him in 20 years or so when he has a girlfriend over and she sees the picture. Too bad, buddy...one of the perks of parenthood is getting to dress your kid up in cute but potentially embarassing outfits! ;)
From the front and back, you can't really see the belly:
From the side however, you can't help but notice it. I am rather happy to report though that nearly 36 weeks and 30 pounds in, I still have no stretch marks
I'd also like to point out that I have apparently thus far overcome the family curse of varicose veins, and my ankles and feet haven't swollen too much:
Two last pictures before I call it a night. First, all of his clothes (except the ones I got today at a work shower), washed and hanging up by size in his closet. As cute as they look hanging up, I'm sure they'll look ever cuter on him! The outfit on the far right is a pair of lederhosen and coordinating shirt we got in Munich when we went to Europe in September 2008. We bought it hoping a little Williamson would come along to wear it...I can't wait to get pictures of him in it, though I can already imagine the embarrassment they might cause him in 20 years or so when he has a girlfriend over and she sees the picture. Too bad, buddy...one of the perks of parenthood is getting to dress your kid up in cute but potentially embarassing outfits! ;)
Second, a sample of some of the cloth diapers I got for Daniel. How cute are these? These aren't the ones that were available when we were babies, with the safety pins and plastic pants!
Monday, June 7, 2010
Baby dreams
I've been having baby-related dreams with increasing frequency, and in all of them, my subconscious seems to be expressing some worries that we aren't prepared for his arrival.
Last night I dreamed that we had brought Daniel home but we didn't have his room set up yet so all his stuff was thrown in boxes rather than folded and organized neatly in the dresser. I was going to put him to bed in our pack n play but couldn't find the bassinet pad for it. I searched all over the house and finally found it in the tub. Apparently it was in the tub because Marko and Nicole's son Alejandro had peed on it-that detail was probably in the dream because Alejandro slept in the pack n play this weekend and wet it on a prior occasion-someone had to be the first! Anywho, in the dream I finally found it and got the bassinet set up but then Daniel woke up again and was crying. I thought his swaddling outfit would make him feel better but couldn't find that either. (Today I added the swaddler to our diaper bag for the hospital as a result of the dream!)
Last night's dream was an improvement on one I had months ago, where Kevin was driving us to some wilderness lodge for a weekend away and on the way there I realized we had had the baby and left it at the hospital (I say "it" because this was before we knew the baby would be a he). I remember being frustrated because I didn't even remember the birth at all and I was asking him if it was a boy or a girl, how it went, and oh yeah, where's the baby now. He said he thought that after going through pregnancy and labor I needed a weekend away. I said we better turn right around and head home and see if we could still get the baby or if CPS had already taken him/her away!
So I have to think that last night's version is much better. Sure his room wasn't ready yet, but at least we remembered to bring him home. That's a good start to the whole parenting thing, right? ;)
After our Bradley class a few weeks ago I dreamed that I was in labor. I was concerned about 2 things: 1) we were only ~30 weeks along so I worried that it was too early, and 2) I told Kevin he had to find our workbook because I couldn't remember if I was supposed to be walking around or lying down relaxing at that stage of the game. Somehow I just didn't know what to do without that Bradley workbook to guide us!
That's actually the only labor dream I've had, or at least the only one I can remember. With 6 weeks left to go I'm sure there are more baby dreams on tap, and what with the waking up to go to the bathroom several times a night I remember my dreams more vividly than usual. Hopefully as we get closer to time and finish our preparations my dreams will involve less chaos and confusion!
Last night I dreamed that we had brought Daniel home but we didn't have his room set up yet so all his stuff was thrown in boxes rather than folded and organized neatly in the dresser. I was going to put him to bed in our pack n play but couldn't find the bassinet pad for it. I searched all over the house and finally found it in the tub. Apparently it was in the tub because Marko and Nicole's son Alejandro had peed on it-that detail was probably in the dream because Alejandro slept in the pack n play this weekend and wet it on a prior occasion-someone had to be the first! Anywho, in the dream I finally found it and got the bassinet set up but then Daniel woke up again and was crying. I thought his swaddling outfit would make him feel better but couldn't find that either. (Today I added the swaddler to our diaper bag for the hospital as a result of the dream!)
Last night's dream was an improvement on one I had months ago, where Kevin was driving us to some wilderness lodge for a weekend away and on the way there I realized we had had the baby and left it at the hospital (I say "it" because this was before we knew the baby would be a he). I remember being frustrated because I didn't even remember the birth at all and I was asking him if it was a boy or a girl, how it went, and oh yeah, where's the baby now. He said he thought that after going through pregnancy and labor I needed a weekend away. I said we better turn right around and head home and see if we could still get the baby or if CPS had already taken him/her away!
So I have to think that last night's version is much better. Sure his room wasn't ready yet, but at least we remembered to bring him home. That's a good start to the whole parenting thing, right? ;)
After our Bradley class a few weeks ago I dreamed that I was in labor. I was concerned about 2 things: 1) we were only ~30 weeks along so I worried that it was too early, and 2) I told Kevin he had to find our workbook because I couldn't remember if I was supposed to be walking around or lying down relaxing at that stage of the game. Somehow I just didn't know what to do without that Bradley workbook to guide us!
That's actually the only labor dream I've had, or at least the only one I can remember. With 6 weeks left to go I'm sure there are more baby dreams on tap, and what with the waking up to go to the bathroom several times a night I remember my dreams more vividly than usual. Hopefully as we get closer to time and finish our preparations my dreams will involve less chaos and confusion!
Monday, May 31, 2010
Our Bradley class experience
As mentioned before, Kevin and I had 4 weeks of Bradley classes. When I tell people we did Bradley courses, I tend to get two questions: "what's Bradley method?" and "how is it different from Lamaze?" So to answer the first and somewhat answer the second, the Bradley method is focused on helping couples achieve a natural, unmedicated childbirth. You learn what happens during the stages of labor and how to relax through the contractions. In effect, you learn that your body knows what it's doing and the best thing to do is to stay out of your own way. As I understand Lamaze, having not looked into it in any detail, that method teaches the woman to concentrate on a focal point and to use artificial breathing patterns to get through contractions and while open to natural birth, is not specifically tailored towards it. So, different routes to the same goal, a healthy baby.
In a nutshell, Bradley says to look at how a dog, a cat, a cow, or other mammal gives birth, and follow their lead. What they do instinctively, women can learn to do to minimize the pain or discomfort of labor. A woman in labor needs complete relaxation (or as close as possible), achieved through the use of deep abdominal breathing, a quiet, dark room, and lying in a comfortable sleep-like position until it's time to push. While the mother is no doubt the star of the show, the father plays a very big role as the labor coach helping mom along through encouragement, massage, and helping her to be as relaxed as possible.
During the classes we learned about the stages of labor and exercises to practice beforehand, some to help stretch the muscles and some to practice relaxation. One relaxation exercise we did at the end of classes was for me and the other two moms to lie on the floor on our sides using a yoga mat and pillows to be comfortable. Robin, our instructor, turned off the lights and would read something to help us to relax, for example, asking us to imagine ourselves lying on a beach. During this time we'd close our eyes and try to consciously relax every part of the body. After a few minutes Robin would tell the guys to simulate a contraction by squeezing our arms or ankles, not enough to be painful but enough to be an uncomfortable distraction. The ladies were then to relax and take deep breaths to tune it out while the guys would offer massage and encouragement. Sometimes she would have us try tensing up, moving, or opening our eyes to see that yes, it actually does feel a lot better when you relax, take deep breaths, and try to focus on a happy thought instead of the discomfort.
The idea of practicing relaxation might sound silly, but anyone who practices yoga knows that releasing tension can actually be quite challenging and does get easier with practice. When we are doing the relaxation practice I'll often think about the end of yoga class when you lie on your back in relaxation pose focusing on one happy thought. Of course the setting will be quite different in labor but I think putting myself in that mindset will help me to relax and the flexibility, breathing technique, and discipline of conscious relaxation that yoga teaches will all come in very handy.
Talking about what to expect physically and emotionally during the different stages of labor in class gave us a good idea what to expect. For example, Robin talked about the transition stage, when you are almost fully dilated and ready to push but not quite. The contractions are apparently quite intense at this point and for many women this is the most difficult part of the whole process. This is, using the Bradley mountain-climbing analogy, the steep part of the trek when you are near the mountain peak but can't see it yet. You're frustrated and maybe ready to give up. Yet, the big moment is almost there, and just recognizing these physical and emotional signposts as encouragement that the end is in sight may be enough to make this time much easier. This is also where the husband-coach can play a big role lending encouragement and a good massage and reminding the mother that the baby will be here very soon.
I suppose most birth classes show a video of an actual birth and ours was no exception. The video in question was from the late 70s/early 80s timeframe, reminding me that I was born during a time of truly unfortunate fashion trends. The mom and dad in the video were both wearing haircuts and clothes representative of the time, with dad even sporting the cheesy mustache, aka "pornstache" or "molestache." Vintage nostalgia/humor aside, it was helpful to see how she managed contractions and he supported her through them. At one point as we got to the pushing stage, the video showed a close-up of mom's face as she breathed through a push. The next shot, with no segueway, zoom-out, or panning downward whatsoever, was a close-up of the head crowning. It was funny, it took all of us in the room a second to realize what we were seeing, then everyone jumped back a bit in their seats! That scary visual notwithstanding, we did note that throughout the process, the mom didn't seem to be in overwhelming pain. It looked like hard work, but doable.
All in all I came away from these classes thinking, labor will be challenging but I know I can do it. The class that freaked me out a little was the very last one, when we talked about what happens after the birth and how to take care of this new little person. Long story short, what I took from that is, you're going to be pretty sore and tired and for the first few days you will barely want to get out of bed. Alas, resting will be a little tough to do what with this new tiny little person with lots of needs to meet.
While dad can do quite a few things, including diaper changes, baths, and soothing baby back to sleep, for those of us who opt to nurse, feedings are a job only mom can do in the early going. I definitely believe the benefits of breastfeeding are worth it, but the thought of round-the-clock feedings every 2 hours for the first weeks is pretty intimidating. I know Kevin will be a wonderfully hands-on father and will do all he can to help, and once we can introduce bottle feedings after a few weeks that'll let us share the feeding duties and let me sleep for longer periods of time. Hopefully those first few weeks will go quickly!
So, that's our Bradley class experience. Overall I think we both learned a lot and came out of it feeling pretty prepared and confident. Hopefully when the big day comes it will all pay off!
In a nutshell, Bradley says to look at how a dog, a cat, a cow, or other mammal gives birth, and follow their lead. What they do instinctively, women can learn to do to minimize the pain or discomfort of labor. A woman in labor needs complete relaxation (or as close as possible), achieved through the use of deep abdominal breathing, a quiet, dark room, and lying in a comfortable sleep-like position until it's time to push. While the mother is no doubt the star of the show, the father plays a very big role as the labor coach helping mom along through encouragement, massage, and helping her to be as relaxed as possible.
During the classes we learned about the stages of labor and exercises to practice beforehand, some to help stretch the muscles and some to practice relaxation. One relaxation exercise we did at the end of classes was for me and the other two moms to lie on the floor on our sides using a yoga mat and pillows to be comfortable. Robin, our instructor, turned off the lights and would read something to help us to relax, for example, asking us to imagine ourselves lying on a beach. During this time we'd close our eyes and try to consciously relax every part of the body. After a few minutes Robin would tell the guys to simulate a contraction by squeezing our arms or ankles, not enough to be painful but enough to be an uncomfortable distraction. The ladies were then to relax and take deep breaths to tune it out while the guys would offer massage and encouragement. Sometimes she would have us try tensing up, moving, or opening our eyes to see that yes, it actually does feel a lot better when you relax, take deep breaths, and try to focus on a happy thought instead of the discomfort.
The idea of practicing relaxation might sound silly, but anyone who practices yoga knows that releasing tension can actually be quite challenging and does get easier with practice. When we are doing the relaxation practice I'll often think about the end of yoga class when you lie on your back in relaxation pose focusing on one happy thought. Of course the setting will be quite different in labor but I think putting myself in that mindset will help me to relax and the flexibility, breathing technique, and discipline of conscious relaxation that yoga teaches will all come in very handy.
Talking about what to expect physically and emotionally during the different stages of labor in class gave us a good idea what to expect. For example, Robin talked about the transition stage, when you are almost fully dilated and ready to push but not quite. The contractions are apparently quite intense at this point and for many women this is the most difficult part of the whole process. This is, using the Bradley mountain-climbing analogy, the steep part of the trek when you are near the mountain peak but can't see it yet. You're frustrated and maybe ready to give up. Yet, the big moment is almost there, and just recognizing these physical and emotional signposts as encouragement that the end is in sight may be enough to make this time much easier. This is also where the husband-coach can play a big role lending encouragement and a good massage and reminding the mother that the baby will be here very soon.
I suppose most birth classes show a video of an actual birth and ours was no exception. The video in question was from the late 70s/early 80s timeframe, reminding me that I was born during a time of truly unfortunate fashion trends. The mom and dad in the video were both wearing haircuts and clothes representative of the time, with dad even sporting the cheesy mustache, aka "pornstache" or "molestache." Vintage nostalgia/humor aside, it was helpful to see how she managed contractions and he supported her through them. At one point as we got to the pushing stage, the video showed a close-up of mom's face as she breathed through a push. The next shot, with no segueway, zoom-out, or panning downward whatsoever, was a close-up of the head crowning. It was funny, it took all of us in the room a second to realize what we were seeing, then everyone jumped back a bit in their seats! That scary visual notwithstanding, we did note that throughout the process, the mom didn't seem to be in overwhelming pain. It looked like hard work, but doable.
All in all I came away from these classes thinking, labor will be challenging but I know I can do it. The class that freaked me out a little was the very last one, when we talked about what happens after the birth and how to take care of this new little person. Long story short, what I took from that is, you're going to be pretty sore and tired and for the first few days you will barely want to get out of bed. Alas, resting will be a little tough to do what with this new tiny little person with lots of needs to meet.
While dad can do quite a few things, including diaper changes, baths, and soothing baby back to sleep, for those of us who opt to nurse, feedings are a job only mom can do in the early going. I definitely believe the benefits of breastfeeding are worth it, but the thought of round-the-clock feedings every 2 hours for the first weeks is pretty intimidating. I know Kevin will be a wonderfully hands-on father and will do all he can to help, and once we can introduce bottle feedings after a few weeks that'll let us share the feeding duties and let me sleep for longer periods of time. Hopefully those first few weeks will go quickly!
So, that's our Bradley class experience. Overall I think we both learned a lot and came out of it feeling pretty prepared and confident. Hopefully when the big day comes it will all pay off!
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Week 32: Let's play Whack-A-Mole!
I remember the first time I felt Daniel kick. I was sitting at my desk at work and had my hand resting on my belly, when I felt what was unmistakeably a kick. Needless to say it was an exciting moment. For the next few weeks I felt them more and more often, but I wouldn't say they were uncomfortable or painful.
These last few weeks though, as Daniel keeps getting bigger and his temporary living space gets more and more cramped, those movements have sometimes become rather unpleasant and at times actually painful. It feels like I have an alien in my belly trying to break out!
Another interesting development as he gets bigger and the uterine lining and amniotic fluid barriers between him and me get thinner is that now I can feel not just movements, but body parts. I can't usually tell which part it is but I can definitely feel a limb poke out. I'll feel something poke me on my right ribs (a favorite spot for him, apparently) and push it in to get it off my ribs. A second later I'll feel some other part poke out on the other side. As soon as I push in on one spot, something pokes out somewhere else. It reminds me of the arcade game whack-a-mole. As soon as you bop one mole another one or two pop up.
Sometimes I think he likes to turn and wedge his backside against my ribs, because I'll feel a big bump that doesn't seem the right shape for a leg or arm. I'm actually rather impressed with how much he seems able to move around in there given the limited space. I can't imagine what it would feel like with twins-a sackful of fighting puppies, or maybe thrashing eels?
Even when it's uncomfortable, I remind myself that an active baby is a healthy baby, so if my ribs feel like a jungle gym and my bladder a trampoline, well, that just means little guy is growing bigger and stronger and developing the way he should. Kevin is convinced that this is proof that Daniel will be quite the athlete. If so, hopefully he inherited Daddy's athletic ability...I'm more enthusiastic about sports than I am good at them, so little guy didn't get much help in that department from me!
I'm guessing he'll be quite an active little wiggle-worm once he's born if this is a preview of his personality. That should make for an interesting challenge trying to change his diaper while he's squirming and thrashing around, all the while trying not to get peed on!
7 1/2 weeks to go...
These last few weeks though, as Daniel keeps getting bigger and his temporary living space gets more and more cramped, those movements have sometimes become rather unpleasant and at times actually painful. It feels like I have an alien in my belly trying to break out!
Another interesting development as he gets bigger and the uterine lining and amniotic fluid barriers between him and me get thinner is that now I can feel not just movements, but body parts. I can't usually tell which part it is but I can definitely feel a limb poke out. I'll feel something poke me on my right ribs (a favorite spot for him, apparently) and push it in to get it off my ribs. A second later I'll feel some other part poke out on the other side. As soon as I push in on one spot, something pokes out somewhere else. It reminds me of the arcade game whack-a-mole. As soon as you bop one mole another one or two pop up.
Sometimes I think he likes to turn and wedge his backside against my ribs, because I'll feel a big bump that doesn't seem the right shape for a leg or arm. I'm actually rather impressed with how much he seems able to move around in there given the limited space. I can't imagine what it would feel like with twins-a sackful of fighting puppies, or maybe thrashing eels?
Even when it's uncomfortable, I remind myself that an active baby is a healthy baby, so if my ribs feel like a jungle gym and my bladder a trampoline, well, that just means little guy is growing bigger and stronger and developing the way he should. Kevin is convinced that this is proof that Daniel will be quite the athlete. If so, hopefully he inherited Daddy's athletic ability...I'm more enthusiastic about sports than I am good at them, so little guy didn't get much help in that department from me!
I'm guessing he'll be quite an active little wiggle-worm once he's born if this is a preview of his personality. That should make for an interesting challenge trying to change his diaper while he's squirming and thrashing around, all the while trying not to get peed on!
7 1/2 weeks to go...
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